McKinsey: What they actually do and the AI hype

Generated Title: CFOs Cling to Budgets Like Life Rafts? More Like Deck Chairs on the Titanic.

Okay, so CFOs are supposedly all stressed out about budgeting in 2026? Give me a break. According to some McKinsey exec, Kevin Carmody, they're "protecting the downside." Translation: they're scared shitless.

The Sky is Always Falling (For Them)

Seriously, this is always the narrative, isn't it? Some consultant from McKinsey & Company (surprise, surprise) tells us that CFOs are being super cautious because of "geopolitical and economic uncertainty." As if that’s new! When isn't there geopolitical and economic uncertainty? It's the freaking background radiation of the 21st century.

Carmody says they're worried about "budgeting for AI and fast-changing technology." Well, duh. AI is either going to make half their workforce obsolete or require massive investments in retraining. Maybe both. And McKinsey AI, I'm sure, has some helpful (read: expensive) solutions for that.

He also says CFOs are "embedding in the budget ways to preserve cash." In other words, layoffs are coming. More "downsizing," "rightsizing," and other euphemisms for kicking people to the curb. Gotta protect those shareholder returns, right? As CFOs are reaching for downside budget protections, McKinsey exec says reports, this is a common strategy.

Stretch Targets? More Like Delusional Fantasies

And here's the kicker: Carmody advises CFOs to set "realistic stretch targets." What a load of corporate-speak! If they were realistic, they wouldn't be stretch targets, would they? It's like saying, "Try to run a marathon, but don't push yourself too hard."

He even suggests flattening the ramp curve for new product launches. "Typically, they’re not all run flawlessly," he admits. No kidding! Most product launches are a train wreck. But instead of fixing the underlying problems, they just lower expectations? What kind of leadership is that?

Oh, and estimating costs is "easier because you have a historic track record." Tell that to anyone dealing with supply chain disruptions or inflation. Historic track records are about as useful as a rotary phone in the age of smartphones.

The Illusion of Control

But here's the part that really gets my goat: "Despite technology that enables continual closes or instant data updates, Carmody said companies continue to set formal 'static' budgets." So, even with all the fancy tech, they're still clinging to these outdated, rigid plans? What's the point of having real-time data if you're just going to ignore it?

Carmody claims that these static budgets help everyone row in the same direction. More like they create a false sense of security. As if a budget can actually predict the future. It's like pretending you're in control of a runaway train just because you have a timetable.

Then again, maybe I'm being too harsh. Maybe these CFOs are just trying to do their jobs in a world that's spinning out of control. But let's be real, most of them are just glorified accountants who are more concerned with spreadsheets than with people. And McKinsey? They're just the high priests of corporate bullshit, selling expensive advice that no one really needs. According to Are you a robot?, McKinsey continues to expand its influence.

So, What's the Real Story?

It's all a dog and pony show. The CFOs are panicking, McKinsey's profiting off their fear, and the rest of us are just along for the ride.